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[14 Mar 2009|03:26pm] |
You took my hand
You showed me how
You promised me you'd be around
Uh huh
That's right
I took your words
And I believed
In everything
You said to me
Yeah huh
That's right
If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong
I know better
Cause you said forever
And ever
Who knew
Remember when we were such fools
And so convinced and just too cool
Oh no
No no
I wish I could touch you again
I wish I could still call you friend
I'd give anything
When someone said count your blessings now
'fore they're long gone
I guess I just didn't know how
I was all wrong
They knew better
Still you said forever
And ever
Who knew
Yeah yeah
I'll keep you locked in my head
Until we meet again
Until we
Until we meet again
And I won't forget you my friend
What happened
If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong and
That last kiss
I'll cherish
Until we meet again
And time makes it harder
I wish I could remember
But I keep your memory
You visit me in my sleep
My darling, who knew
My darling
My darling
Who knew
My darling
I miss you
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[02 Mar 2009|09:01pm] |
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mood |
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 nostalgic |
] |
I like the feel of your name on my lips
And I like the sound of your sweet gentle kiss
The way that your fingers run through my hair
And how your scent lingers even when your not there
And I like the way your eyes dance when you laugh
And how you enjoy your two hour bath
And how you convinced me to dance in the rain
With everyone watching like we were insane
But I love the way you love me
Strong and wild
Slow and easy
Heart and soul...
So completely
I love the way you love me
I like to imitate old Jerry Lee
And watch you roll your eyes when I'm slightly off key
And I like the innocent way that you cry
At sappy old movies you've seen hundreds of times
But I love the way you love me
Strong and wild
Slow and easy
Heart and soul
So completely
I love the way you love me
And I could list a million things
I love to like about you
But they all come down to one reason:
I could never live without you
I love the way you love me
Strong and wild
Slow and easy
Heart and soul
So completely
I love the way you love me
Oh baby I love the way you love me
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[22 Feb 2009|12:43pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sore |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Fray "You Found Me" |
] |
I found god on the corner of first and Amistad
Where the west was all but won
All alone, smoking his last cigarette
I said, "where you been," he said, "ask anything"
Where were you when everything was falling apart?
All my days were spent by the telephone
It never rang
And all I needed was a call that never came
To the corner of first and Amistad
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lying on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why’d you have to wait?
Where were you? Where were you?
Just a little late
You found me, you found me
In the end everyone ends up alone
Losing her, the only one who’s ever known
Who I am, who I’m not, who I want to be
No way to know how long she will be next to me
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lying on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why’d you have to wait?
Where were you, where were you?
Just a little late
You found me, you found me
Early morning, city breaks
I’ve been calling for years and years and years and years
And you never left me no messages
You never send me no letters
You got some kind of nerve, taking all I want
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lying on the floor
Where were you where were you
Lost and insecure
You found me, you found me
Lying on the floor
Surrounded, surrounded
Why’d you have to wait?
Where were you, where were you?
Just a little late
You found me, you found me
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[14 Feb 2009|11:00pm] |
Complete and total adoration,
My gift to you, my heart was yours.
In ten weeks you shaped it,
In one night you murdered it.
Torn from my chest and laid at your feet,
That first step you took was the worst.
Since then you've walked a thousand miles in silence and short remark,
I still have these memories,
But we'll never see what we could have been.
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember, cause that's all you can do.
We'll never make another memory,
We'll never make another memory.
I wish I'd have died in your arms the last time we were together,
So I wouldn't have to wake without you today.
This time I thought things were real.
You said they were, what happened?
You were a priority, was I an option?
I let you see a side of me that I don't share with anyone.
Promises are just words unless they are fulfilled.
you knew from the beginning all I had to offer you was my heart,
I'm sorry that wasn't enough.
So, we'll go our own ways,
And hopefully you'll remember the things I've told you,
Hopefully you'll understand that everything I said was in sincerity.
A broken heart is not what I wanted from this,
But I guess I've learned from it.
But aren't you supposed to learn from your mistakes?
I don't consider this a mistake,
I just wish the story didn't end this way,
Cause I'm still in love with the person who helped me write it.
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
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| =) |
[13 Feb 2009|06:32am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 satisfied |
] |
I have never had so much going on in my life, especially when majority of it is directly related to nursing and class. It's now that I realize that you really do have to sacrifice a lot in order to get through nursing school- I cannot tell you the last time I worked out OR the last time I had over 4 hours of sleep in one night.
Despite my stress level hitting the roof, yesterday was the first day that I actually felt sure about nursing. I absolutely love it. I'm actually excited about it. And now I'm only MORE anxious to do more after the skills I performed yesterday out in the clinical setting.
I'm very glad I stuck with nursing all this time. Now is the hard part: getting through it.
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| Hope - Who Am I To Say |
[01 Jan 2009|10:07pm] |
Love of my life, my soulmate
You're my best friend
Part of me like breathing
Now half of me is left
Don't know anything at all
Who am I to say you love me
I don't know anything at all
And who am I to say you need me
Color me blue I'm lost in you
Don't know why I'm still waiting
Many moons have come and gone
Don't know why I'm still searching
Don't know anything at all
And who am I to say you love me
I don't know anything at all
And who am I to say you need me
Hmmm hmmm mmm
Uhhh oohhh aahhh
Hooo aahhh ohh ohhh
Now you're a song I love to sing
Never thought it feels so free
Now I know what's meant to be
And that's okay with me
But who am I to say you love me
And who am I to say you need me
And who am I to say you love me
Mmmm hmmm
I don't know anything at all
And who am I to say you love me
I don't know anything at all
And who am I to say you need me
I don't know anything at all
I don't know anything at all
I don't know anything at all
I don't know anything at all
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[04 Oct 2008|01:42am] |
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This one's for the lonely,
The ones that seek and find,
Only to be let down
Time after time
This one's for the torn down
The experts at the fall
Cmon friends get up now
You're not alone at all
And this part was for her
This part was for her
This part was for her
Does she remember? :-/
It comes and goes in waves, i....
This one's for the faithless
The ones that are surprised
They are only where they are now
Regardless of their fight
This one's for believing
If only for it's sake
Cmon friends get up now
Love is to be made
And this part was for her
This part was for her
This part was for her
Does she remember? :-/
It comes and goes in waves,
I am only let to wonder why
It comes and goes in waves
I am only let to wonder why
...Why I try.
This is for the ones who stand
For the ones who try again
For the ones who need a hand
For the ones who think they can
It comes and goes in waves,
I am only let to wonder why
It comes and goes in waves
I am only let to wonder why
...Why I try
:-/
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[24 Sep 2008|07:31am] |
If you're on my friends list, I want to know 36 things about you. I don't care if we never talk, or if we already know everything about each other. Short and sweet is fine ... you're on my list, so i want to know you better!
Comment here and repost a blank one on your own journal.
01) Are you currently in a serious relationship?
02) What was your dream growing up?
03) What talent do you wish you had?
04) If I bought you a drink what would it be?
05) Favorite vegetable?
06) What was the last book you read?
07) What zodiac sign are you?
08) Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Explain where.
09) Worst Habit?
10) If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
11) What is your favorite sport?
12) Do you have a Pessimistic or Optimistic attitude?
13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14) Worst thing to ever happen to you?
15) Tell me one weird fact about you.
16) Do you have any pets?
17) What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?
18) What was your first impression of me?
19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21) Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
22) What color eyes do you have?
23) Ever been arrested?
24) Bottle or can soda?
25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?
27) What's your favorite place to hang out at?
28) Do you believe in ghosts?
29) Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
30) Do you swear a lot?
31) Biggest pet peeve?
32) In one word, how would you describe yourself?
33) Do you believe/appreciate romance?
34) Favourite and least favourite food?
35) Do you believe in God?
36) Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?
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[19 Sep 2008|07:22am] |
I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know
Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?
See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever
Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know
Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy 
:-/
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[09 Sep 2008|10:00pm] |
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music |
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Heartbreak World |
] |
I am in awe. Complete and utter disbelief. In denial of it all. Hearbroken. Disgusted. Ashamed. Disappointed and let down. Disturbed. Embarrassed of her. Misled. Lied to. Confused. I feel like someone has punched me in the gut and took my breath away. There is no consideration for others...not even for me. There is absolutely no remorse whatsoever.
I cannot find all of the words and other metaphors to describe how I’m feeling…of what I’m thinking…what’s racing through my mind.
It can’t be me. It doesn’t happen to me. It just can't be. Not me. It’s typical maybe of other people’s lives, not mine. Not mine. It happens to other families, but not mine. This cannot be my life. Things like this do not happen to me….they do not happen to us. They just don't.
I don’t think that I could even go home now. I don’t think I could even look at her without feeling all these horrible feelings and picturing all these horrific mental pictures that I should NEVER have to picture about her. How will I ever look at her again?
Why did she have to go and fucking do that? How could she? How could anyone do that knowing all the people it would affect? How long has this even been going on?....was it occurring the days I wasn’t home and out working? When I was sleeping? In my own house? In our home?
I feel like everything she ever told, taught, said, or showed me is nothing but a lie. I feel like anything she supported me with or encouraged me to do, I want to quit and never do it again. Like, she encourages me doing nursing and stay in school….now all I want to do is quit school altogether. Anything associated with her, I want gone.
I feel like I lost my best friend. Never again will I be able to consider her as my best friend. I want to forget everything in our past together. They are all lies now. All of them. Now there is nothing. Nothing but anger. In a way I never want to see her again. I want to move away. I want her to know how much this is affecting me. How much she is not only ruining herself, but ruining me. She is ruining everything I ever thought of her. I used to think the world of her, now I have no respect, sympathy, or anything for her. At least not for awhile. It’s going to take a lot to get any of those things back from me. If she ever does get it back.
I wish I could be there for my sisters back home. I know they have it harder being home. I wish I could be there for when everything comes out on the table. Not because I want to be there, but because I feel like it’s where I need to be when it happens.
I can’t even begin explain what I think about when I think about the future. How things will be and what will happen…
I know it’s ultimately supposed to be an issue between them. But I cannot help to believe that it also involves me indirectly. I know it shouldn’t change my relationship with her, but I don’t see how it could NOT change. Not after I saw what I saw. Not after how it affects all of us. Not ever again. Never will it EVER be the same.
What do I even do now… :-/
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[02 Sep 2008|08:35pm] |
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Oh, Nathania Bush...
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[21 Aug 2008|08:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 giddy |
] |
i don't know how i will be able to pay attention and get through nursing school...
with a teacher like i have.
wow!
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[20 Aug 2008|10:20pm] |
Oh my. Ohhh my....
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[18 Aug 2008|05:41pm] |
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mood |
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 stressed |
] |
it's the first day and i'm already stressed out.
i already have 113 pages to read BY wednesday.
it took me an hour to read 10 pages.
so yeah, my life is over...
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[15 Aug 2008|08:22am] |
my car got towed.
and my roommate had sex in front of me.
great start to the semester...
EDIT: AAAAND someone deactivated my facebook account thinking i'm still in a sorority.
uggh
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[13 Aug 2008|04:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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nostalgic |
] |
I've been so busy worrying about packing and fitting all my crap in my car that it hasn't hit me (until a moment ago) that I'm leaving.
It's harder to leave for school this year. I don't want to go back. I will miss a lot of things. I'll actually miss work. I'll miss my mom...and ollie! And Heather. Plus I won't be in a sorority which will take up all my time like it used to.
Maybe the nursing program will keep me busy. As much as I hope it doesn't kick my butt, I hope it keeps my mind off of things...
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[29 Jul 2008|08:44pm] |
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music |
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Tracy Lawrence |
] |
Everybody wants to slap your back,
Wants to shake your hand
When you're up on top of that mountain
But let one of those rocks give way then you slide back down look up
And see who's around then
This ain't where the road comes to an end
This ain't where the bandwagon stops
This is just one of those times when a lot of folks jump off
You find out who your friends are
Somebody's gonna drop everything
Run out and crank up their car
Hit the gas, get there fast
Never stop to think 'what's in it for me?' or 'it's way too far'
They just show on up with their big old heart
You find out who your friends are.
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[29 Jul 2008|05:40am] |
| [ |
music |
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Switchfoot "The Shadow Proves The Sunshine" |
] |
Dry eyes in the pouring rain.
The shadow proves the s u n s h i n e.
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[28 Jul 2008|07:18pm] |
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is it weird that I can't wait to go back to school?
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[27 Jul 2008|09:18pm] |
"There is no greater sorrow than to recall in misery the time when we were happy."
-Dante
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